Strengthening Our Faith While Waiting On...You Know... What's His Name - Zeb's Birth Story

     As most of you know, we have welcomed a new member to our family. Yes, we were surprised again. And yes, we know what causes it. Now that I got that out of the way, I can tell you that I wanted another child anyway. But the time definitely didn't seem right, not to mention Matt was content with three. I knew immediately after Bliss was born that I wanted another child, which wasn't the case with Silas and Camden. I had a short period of "contentment" after each of them was born where I thought I would be fine if they were our last. After having Bliss, though, our family just didn't feel complete. I cried countless times at the thought of being "finished", but I sure thought we were. For one, Matt had lost his job of ten years in less than two months after we brought Bliss home from the hospital (a HUGE shock). Secondly, we didn't have health insurance. And lastly, Matt started his own plumbing business that was still very much in the "building it up" phase. So, having another baby didn't seem like a very responsible thing to do. We were also looking to begin fostering again. Then... we found out we were expecting.
     Here's the series of events that led to that discovery. Matt was getting nervous after I was a few days late and wanted me to test, so he took a break from his job one day to meet me at Walmart. He watched the kids in the van while I went in to buy a test. I tested in the restroom, and waited until I was outside with Matt so we could look at it together. There they were. Two lines (although one was very faint). After Matt confirmed with me that he was reading the test correctly, he went back to his job and I went home. Yep. If I could do it over, I would definitely do it differently. This story just doesn't seem so... blog worthy.
     It just so happens that we had just applied for a health insurance that my dad just happened to mention that just happened to take preexisting. I did go to my OB right away since I had problems during previous pregnancies that you can read about in previous posts. So we had to pay a lot of lab work out of pocket until my insurance kicked in. But it did, after just a couple of weeks. By the way, it turns out that the reason for a faint line on my test was due to the fact that I ovulated way later than usual (hence the whole surprise part). So in reality, I shouldn't have even tested yet, because I wasn't really late (And I even took the "up to 6 days sooner" test).
     Over the next couple of months, jobs started coming more steadily for Matt. Then, he got a HUGE job deal that helped us tremendously. And since that was completed, he has still stayed busy with other jobs. Praise God!
     We found out we were having a boy via a gender reveal party. I was surprised! I thought we were having another girl due to this pregnancy being similar to my pregnancy with Bliss.  As you can tell, Silas' vote was for a girl. He was a little upset...

...Okay, a lot upset. Poor guy!

     He really wanted another sister. He prayed for this to be a girl. Plus, he wanted things to be even. Two boys and two girls.
     Now it was time to start talking names. We always have such a hard time with names, so there was no point in exhausting ourselves thinking of names for both genders. Now we knew we were having a boy, so we needed a first and middle name. We couldn't think of anything we cared for. We wanted something different with something Biblical with a strong meaning. I prayed often for God to reveal the name for our son. So it was surprising that we didn't have a name and were in the ninth month of pregnancy. A week or so before we had the baby at least we had a list. Whether or not we were going to go with a name off  that list, we weren't sure.
     Toward the end of my pregnancy, my OB kept telling me the time could be close. I wasn't aware I was in labor with Bliss and had her pretty quickly after arriving at the hospital, so I was pretty nervous this time. I certainly didn't want to deliver in my minivan! I went in one day for a check-up and told my doctor I hadn't felt the baby move in a while, and that this was out of character for him. He was a big mover and a constant mover. So the doctor did an NST. No movement. So she gave it a bit longer. Still no movement. She looked at the strip and there was no variation. My doctor was very concerned and in a not so calm way told me to walk over to Labor and Delivery. She said I would be having a baby that day. I would have to be induced or possibly a cesarian depending on how baby dealt with labor. I was pretty scared. I called Matt to let him know the plan and evidently sounded pretty upset and didn't explain things very well. He was terrified and thought he wasn't even going to make it to the hospital in time for the birth.
     When I got to L&D though, they hooked me up to the monitor, and before long, my little guy started moving. Things were looking better off and on. And eventually everything was back to normal. Not only that, the nurse asked me how long my contractions had been every two to three minutes apart. I told her I didn't know that they were. She checked me and found that I had dialted from a three to a five in just the time I walked over from the doctor's office to the L&D unit. Needless to say no pitocin. I didn't have to be induced! About three or three and a half hours after I arrived there, I gave birth a very precious and healthy baby boy.

8 pounds 11 ounces
21 inches long
Born at 7:40 PM
September 19, 2012



     I was hoping that the moment we saw his face, we'd have a name for him. That wasn't the case, though. I did kind of think we would end up going with Shepherd, because it was one on the list that I liked pretty well. .



  But more than a day later, when he had his "real" clothes on, Matt and I both looked at him and knew he was a Zeb.

     That was actually a name that Matt had mentioned when we first began discussing names. I didn't like it at all then. Looking at that little face though, Zeb was a perfect name, and I fell in love with it. His full name would be Zebadiah Quinn Russell. Zebadiah means "God has bestowed" or "God has given". Quinn means "Wisdom".  His name means that "God has bestowed wisdom". That I can live with. And ZQ are pretty cool initials too!
 


What did we all get out of this aside from a very handsome little boy? Our FAITH was strengthened!

•  I was afraid I would go the rest of my life with sadness and regrets from not having another child. I prayed for God to help me with my feelings. He chose to do that by giving me another child. My husband was content with three. Now... he's even more content with four (insert chuckles here).  We wouldn't have wanted to keep him from this moment.

• We were concerned about how we could afford the medical bills for another baby. God provided an affordable health insurance just in time, after over a year without. There's no way we could have afforded a baby without it.
• We were concerned about how we could support ourselves during the first stages of owning a business, let alone another child. God provided Matt with an opportunity to step his business up to the next level, so that our income would become more steady.
• We were concerned (especially Matt) about not making it to the hospital in time. God got me over to the hospital when I was in labor, so no delivering in our minivan. Apparently my body thinks I'm a pro and that I don't need much warning that baby is coming, because with the last two babies I didn't feel much pain until an hour or two before baby arrived. God allowed me to already be at the hospital for other reasons both times.
• We were concerned for our little guy when his strip wasn't looking good. God took care of him. We're forever thankful for that! The doctor said he was laying on his cord, more than likely causing it kink, if I remember correctly. Zeb did recover, though, and I didn't have to have a ceasarian or even be induced. Yay!
• We were concerned about a name. I prayed, and God delivered in His time. It couldn't be more perfect for him.
• Silas really wanted a sister. To him, that would work out best for our family. God taught Silas to have faith that He knows what is best. By the looks of these pictures, I'd say Silas is happy with another brother.

 

     So there you have it. Turns out while we were worrying concerned about everything, God was handling everything. And I couldn't imagine life any other way.



Silas - Not your average Joe

I wrote this when I couldn't sleep early the morning of Silas' birthday.
 
     In a few short hours, my firstborn son will be waking up and we will be celebrating his seventh birthday here in Branson, Missouri. Silver Dollar City is his very favorite place. He loves the shows, the shops, the rides, and the demonstrations. Seven. This is huge to him, by the way. Silas seems to think this is the year of all years. He thinks now that he will be seven that many new doors have opened for him, that many things will change. We'll see, I guess. Anyway, today, a post for Silas...

     The best words to describe Silas would be old soul. If he could sip coffee in a donut shop at six in the morning while swapping stories from days of old with a bunch of old men, he'd be in paradise. Here's a photo that definitely depicts that.

 
     One thing that Matt and I admire about Silas is that he is very confident in who he is. He has a mind of his own, and is not swayed by his peers. He likes what he likes, and while caring about others, he doesn't care what others think he should think or do.
     What does he like? I'm glad you asked. Well, he likes fishing, and it's something he talks about constantly. He has a tackle box for bass fishing and one for trout, and now wants some for cat and crappie fishing. He "studies" effective fishing strategies, and he knows all the parts of a fish and can recognize many different types. He wants to be a professional fisherman when he grows up, and have several boats in different colors.

      He wants to be a "picker" when he grows up too. Ha! He loves all kinds of stuff (even things we call junk), so this isn't surprising. How many seven year olds do you know that aspire to be a picker? Of course, he also wants to be a missionary and witness to pirates. When I told him that sounded dangerous since pirates are mean, he responded, "Well, that's why it's so important that I tell them about Jesus. They need a savior." Can't argue with that!

     Silas likes tools and building things. We get him a lot of little kits from Lowe's that he can build, but he also likes to invent things of his own. He loves to help his dad build things and do outside projects too. Here is a picture of him with his real tools he got for Christmas last year.

 He really likes to shoot his BB gun and he's pretty good. This is a picture of his reaction when he got it last year. He was not expecting it!

 

He loves to try new foods and has pretty sophisticated taste.
                                   

     Silas likes to cook, especially his own recipes.This is a love he also shares with his dad, although  I have to say that I like his dad's inventions better. Here's my little cook.

 That's true when talking about food anyway. But Silas has pretty good inventions for other things. His wheels are ALWAYS turning! This is what he came up with for fall festival one year. His dad helped him make it a reality. Yep, he's a wall!

  

 

     He REALLY likes soccer and has a real talent for it! And he can run extremely fast.

 

      My little guy has just recently started drawing quite a bit. Here is the first real picture he ever drew.

 

 He likes Rescue Heroes and old shows like Andy Griffith and I Love Lucy. Facing the Giants is currently his favorite movie. He likes musicals a lot (Annie Get Your Gun, Sound of Music, Yankee Doodle etc.). We all do around here. He really likes shows on how to rebuild cars, but since we only use our TV to watch videos, he can only do that when we are visiting a hotel. So every time we go out of town, that's what he expects to watch.  He collects bugs, rocks, seashells, seeds, leaves, and clothes hanger sizing tabs (a weird one, I know).
     Silas has also met the girl he says he wants to marry. He's known for a few years now. He wants seventeen kids too. I hope he's cleared that with her! He's looking at land (not wanting to pay too much, you know), and has a running list of features he wants for his home. Good grief! Here is Silas and sweet little Emily.

Then

And Now

     He loves to learn everything about anything. He has such a passion for learning.That is with the exception of reading, but that is because it is difficult for him. He is making huge improvements though, and when he gets really good at it, I know he will love it because that is a tool he will be able to use to learn even more. I feel so blessed that he is a lover of learning. Here he is at a family field trip to the Museum of Discovery.

     Most importantly, though, my Silas is a lover of God. For this, I am the most grateful. He loves to sing about the Lord and to the Lord. Silas cares about what God thinks of his decisions and what God wants for his life. He is a prayer warrior. Silas prays often about everything. I am just so blessed. Here is a picture of him at a restaurant on our way to the beach. I was handing out food to my other kiddos and turned to see this. Silas saying the blessing before their breakfast.

Well, that's Silas. We are so proud of him and the person he is becoming! I pray that Matt and I will raise him up in a way that is pleasing to the Lord, and that he will grow be exactly who the Lord desires for him to be.


   

Hold the pickles. Hold the Lettuce. Hold the Bag Out of the Window?

I wrote this while I was pregnant and never posted it. I guess I thought it sounded grouchy and didn't want people to think I was just being hormonal. Now that my newest little guy is six weeks old, I am still probably hormonal, but have decided to post it anyway. So here it is. Please don't feel that I'm always a grouch.

  It is no secret that customer service these days is not what it was just a decade ago. While many can shrug their shoulders and go on, I find this very difficult. Now, before I go any further, I will say that when I'm pregnant, I am way less tolerant. Pregnant or not, though, I still think this is a huge problem. I know that there are some exceptional people in every business place, but I shouldn't have to hope that a certain person is working on the day I need to visit that business.
     You may remember the commercials. I remember one where employees of a major retailer were making themselves available around the store asking people if they needed assistance. "Can I help you find anything?" "How are you today?" I remember going to that store as a young child and finding that to be true. Everywhere we turned someone would ask if they could help us with anything. Now I can go to that same store and have to search half the store before I find an employee, then chase them across the next half of the store to get their attention. Then when I ask them to help me find something, they act inconvenienced. Instead of taking me there, they point me in the general direction. If I do want someone to go out of their way to help me, I have to go in a store where employees get commission. People apparently are only courteous if their paycheck depends on it. I feel like one's paycheck should depend on it, commission or not.
     When I drive through a fast food restaurant (with the exception of one), the people taking my order are often rude and have forgotten all manners. Then many times when I drive up, I can go through one and even two windows without even having a word spoken to me. As a matter of fact, at two different restaurants, before I've even pulled up to the second window, I've seen someone dangling my food outside. I wouldn't even have to stop! Heaven forbid I ask for condiments!!
     This is a big deal. You never know what the person you are being rude to is going through. One day, several years back, I'd just been to the doctor and found out my baby no longer had a heartbeat. Later that day, I had to run inside a local drug store to pick up a few small items, and the cashier was on his cell phone the whole time. I couldn't even ask him a question, though I'd attempted to several times. I still remember that after all these years. He didn't know what I was going through. But by paying attention to me and helping me with my question and treating me like I was a somebody, he might not have sent me out of the store bawling.
     Anyhow, I would be happy to see people skills being taught as a part of the training process after being hired on somewhere (because apparently they weren't taught at home). I really wish that employers would take extra efforts in their hiring process, and try to hire kind and courteous people.
    
    
  

What's In A Name

    Our Bible Curriculum this year covers all of the names for Jesus and their meanings. So during the first week of school, the parents were to write a letter about why we chose our child's name. I decided to do this for my two oldest, and will do this for the other little ones when they get older. Choosing a name is a huge deal to me, so I thought this was a great idea and wanted to make it into something extra special. I found a really cool website, and ordered the boys bracelets with their names and Bible verses engraved on them. The Bible verses went along with their names as I explained in their letters.
     On the day we presented the boys with their letters and bracelets, they were very excited. We did it on a Sunday morning, and they got to wear their bracelets to church.


     Here is Silas' letter.

Here is Camden's letter.

Here are their bracelets.

 This was a really good activity suggested by My Father's World, because it set the stage for the year. It helped the boys to understand how important they are as individuals to God and to us. It also helps them to see that all of the names Jesus is called by have special meanings that show us who He is and what He is able to do.



School's Out For The Summer.....NOT!!!

     Right around the time school was out, I brought home Silas' curriculum for the next school year. This is the second year now that you would have thought it was Christmas in our house when I brought it in! Silas looked all through the box, and had me read the back of all of our read aloud books for the year. Then out came the question that I'd started to guess was coming.
     "Mom, can we start school tomorrow?" I explained that we had just finished and needed a break. He looked so pitiful. I then started thinking that with a new baby coming it may not be a bad idea. If I needed to take some time off, I wouldn't get too far off schedule. Plus, why not do school while he's enthusiastic about it and take a break when he's not? So, two weeks later, we started school. Of course, with summer camps, trips, and VBS we only got in a few scattered weeks. That's summer for you! It just made him more excited about all of it. Now we are back into the groove of our regular school year. At least until baby comes, that is.
     This is my third year of official homeschooling. (I say "official", because don't we all teach our children at home from birth?) Each year, I love it more and more. I am so glad that the Lord led us down this path, even though I sometimes have fears about me failing the kids in some way (that probably needs to be a whole different blog post). But, I am learning and growing in my teaching and confidence. So, I am just as excited, and maybe even more sometimes, each morning when it's time to start! I think that it is important for kids to see their parents' love and enthusiasm for learning. It definitely seems to rub off on mine. Having a curriculum that fits both the parents and children is definitely a must. I am so glad we have found our match. This is the stuff we get to dive into this year. Of course, the language and math are not pictured, but I'm really excited about those as well.

I Spy Something New

      As many of you know, my husband and I are expecting again. We always try to announce our pregnancies in a creative way to add to the excitement. So... I asked a friend, who does some awesome things with a camera and a computer, to help us out.  Did she ever deliver! Thanks a million, Jessica!
      Since we already had our first ever family beach trip booked for the end of the summer, I wanted to do something with that. Our family dressed in beach appropriate attire (with a partially deflated beach ball tucked under my shirt), and had Jessica take our picture in front of our fireplace. Then she went home and did her magic, and transported us to the beach. We then showed the picture to family and told them we were toying with the idea of having a picture taken similar to this at  the beach, and wanted to know what they thought.
 Then we posted the picture on Facebook with a similar type comment. The reactions were fun. One friend said she liked it, but might go with a different color scheme. She missed the message I was trying to get across! I appreciated her sincere willingness to help though. Ha! My brother thought it was a picture from another pregnancy, but kept counting until he figured it out. We certainly got some fun reactions. Here's the pic...

I'm hoping to replicate this picture when we are at the beach, but we'll see. I imagine I'll be bigger than this now that I think about it. This is the size I am now. I'll be 30 and 31 weeks while I'm there!

Fabulous 4-H

     A few months back we let Silas join our local 4-H club. It has been wonderful for him! I'd always thought this club was just for children who wanted to show their farm animals at the fair. I discovered that simply wasn't true. You name it, and they probably have it. A child has pick of many topics to explore: photography, forestry, sewing, oral presentations, shooting, cooking, gardening, debate, pet care, bicycle safety, modeling, raising livestock...there are literally hundreds of things included. Silas has done fish identification, bait casting, oral presentations, and is about to begin growing his own pumpkins and watermelons. He's only been in this club for a few months!
     He loves working hard so that he can earn his ribbons. Until you're nine, you only get a participation ribbon. After that, a child can actually place in competitions. Silas hasn't been bothered by it though. He works just as hard as his older club members. I would even venture to say he is more dedicated than some. This club is all about helping and teaching kids to be hardworking, respectful, and responsible adults when they grow up. I believe that this is a solid program, and I highly recommend it. It is not time consuming, and children can prepare and practice everything from home. There is one meeting per month and there are usually a few hours set aside every now and then for the club members to come and present their stuff that they have studied, practiced, or put together.
     Recently, Silas prepared and presented an oral presentation that he had put together on the water cycle. He developed a huge interest in this topic during one of our homeschool units that we were studying. Considering that he is only six years old, and that this was his first presentation, I feel like he did a great job. Shortly afterwards, he was asked to give his presentation again at our county's Cattleman Association dinner/meeting. In the video you can tell that he is extremely nervous (though he handled dropping his visuals well), but he did great. He only forgot to present a couple of...um...minor details. You can hear his grandma and baby sister in the background, but I think you can still hear him....

Oh, and check out that eye contact!



 



Our Calling to Homeschool: How It All Began

     When Silas was almost three, my husband and I started thinking very seriously about where he would go to school. We didn't live in the school district that we wanted to send him to, and moving wouldn't work for us at the time. So, we looked into a private school. I interviewed someone at that school and loved it. I just knew it was right for us. Upon seeing the price tag though, I knew that it was NOT in our budget. Still, I thought this was God's will. So, I knew He would provide a way. We prayed for about two years, but that door never opened.
     Then I decided to homeschool Silas just for preschool. I really enjoyed it! After a while, I started thinking about what it would be like to homeschool all the way through. I had mentioned it to Matt, and he wasn't keen on the idea. He thought it sounded weird. We didn't know anyone who had homeschooled. I began to really pray about it, and by the end of that school year things changed. Matt had seen how much Silas had learned and enjoyed it. Together, after much discussion and research, we decided to give it another year.
     Although the curriculum we had used for Silas was a really strong one, it moved a little too fast for us. Plus, the workload was a bit heavy. So, we went on a search for one that fit our family the best. I wanted one that gave us time to do more than just math and grammar, and still have time for other things in the afternoon. Boy did I find one! 
     At a homeschool conference, a very sweet acquaintance passed by at a booth that I was visiting. She sat down with me for over half an hour and told me about this curriculum that she had used with her children. She showed me through the books and told me of her family's experiences with it. I was sold and will always be thankful that she took the time to tell me how the Lord had blessed her family with this curriculum. The Word of God is woven into every subject, and most everything is hands on. We love that! .
     After using this for a couple of months, we all decided that homeschooling would be permanent in our family. Every single member of the family was getting involved in the projects and experiments. We were all learning so much.
     That was the point everything hit me. I became thankful that we didn't live in our preferred school district. I became thankful that we couldn't afford private school. And I became thankful that God knew the plans he had for us. He had brought us to this point through circumstances that I had viewed as obstacles. I was SO wrong, and I am SO glad that I was.
     I know that God has different plans and gives different convictions to people in all areas: careers, amount of children, which church to attend, what area to serve, etc. What I love is how He says that if we delight in Him, He will give us the desires of our hearts. He has changed so many of my desires. I love that! I think about how miserable it would be if God didn't line up my desires to match His. I want to please God in every part of my life. Right now, I see that my place here in our home, with all our little ones, and with us homeschooling them, is right where God wants me. It is His desire for me, and so it is my desire.






And now for some pictures....

This is Camden using M&Ms to do his counting and colors. He loves all of the candy counting books! The Reese's Pieces Counting by Fives book is his favorite.

My boys are making bird feeders while learning about birds. We will go into much more detail on birds next year .

This is Silas doing an experiment on things that mixed with water and stayed together, and things that could be separated again. Plus, he learned the proper terminology. Yes, I know he's not wearing a shirt. We homeschool. We don't have to be properly dressed in our classroom. We'll work on modesty another day. Ha!

Here they are studying electricity. Their good ol' Dad leads most of the experiments! By the way, you see Camden learning right here along Silas. He's learning what he can at his level of cognition. I love this! He feels included. Plus, when it's his turn to learn it, he will be way ahead of the game.

We used frozen corndog bites to work with Camden with his alphabet. Then we baked them and ate them. We can often be found using food to teach or reinforce. Yum!

I'm beyond glad that I get to be a part of all this!

 

 

A Huge Surprise! - Bliss' Birth Story

     When I went to my post-natal check-up after Camden was born, my doctor told me that when Matt and I were ready for another little one, to let him know.  There were certain medicines that I would need to take to keep the baby healthy right from the start. We kept that in mind.
     In the mean time, after much discussion and prayer, we decided to become foster parents (I will dedicate another post to this story later on). During our second placement, I began to feel really weird. I thought my body was really messed up. At one point (because I'm usually pretty in tune with my body), I even thought, "If I didn't know any better, I'd think I was pregnant...Nah!" After a while, Matt became concerned too, and told me to make a doctor's appointment. I was planning on it, but decided to take a pregnancy test before I called, knowing that would be the first question they would ask. I wanted to have my ducks in a row. When two lines immediatly showed up, I handed the test to Matt, speechless. He looked at it and said, "Test again." So, I did, getting the same result.
     Tears just flowed, because it was too late in the evening to call a doctor. I felt like a horrible mom. I just kept thinking, " If only I had tested a couple of weeks ago. I could already have been on medicine." It's just that it seemed impossible. Things just didn't add up. After puttings all of the kids to bed, I sank into my own bed with a heavy heart, praying for my baby.
     The next morning, Matt woke me up before leaving for work. He said, "Take another test." I did (Thank goodness for three packs). I gave it to him while he was standing by the door ready to leave. He looked at the two lines, turned around and left for work without uttering a word. I'm telling you, we were shocked!
     I called my OB as soon as the office opened. I told them I was pregnant, and needed some medicine. They told me that the doctor was out of town, and that I'd have to wait for him to write the prescription when he got back. I couldn't make anyone understand. I cried to them, letting them know that I could not lose another baby. They said they couldn't help me. I had to figure something out. That's it! My Mom! I try to wait to tell people that I'm expecting when I'm further along, but I also needed help. I didn't want to tell her over the phone, so I drove to the hospital where she works. I told her I was expecting, and that I couldn't get in touch with my doctor to get meds. She stepped up handled things. She called another doctor, explained the situation, and got my medicine prescribed right then. She also got me in to see the doctor very quickly. I took my sister-in-law with me to my first appointment. Matt couldn't get off work, and I didn't want to go by myself in case there may have been bad news.
     The doctor gave me an ultrasound. Do you know what? Everything was fine. [ INSERT GIANT SIGH AND TEARS OF RELIEF HERE] The baby looked great! Since it was nothing short of God's divine intervention that I was pregnant, then why hadn't I figured out that God had this handled too?
      To let you know how much more of a God thing this was, you should know that out of my grandmother-in-law's three grandkids, every single one of their wives were expecting. My due date was October 27, another's was also October 27th, and the other's was November 27th. That's crazy to me!
     When I started showing, we decided to share the news by sending out invitations. The card said something like:

You're Invited

What: A Birthday Party

When: Sometime around October 27th

Where: Baptist Medical Center

R.S.V.P.: (I put our phone numbers here)

     We stuck them in the mail, and headed off to Branson. You wouldn't believe the calls we got while we were there. Some people called with uncontrolled laughter, some with shock, some with disbelief, some were like, "Is this saying what I think it's saying?" The cards were a success! When each person called, it was like we got to celebrate all over again. It was definitely my favorite reveal!
     The rest of the pregnancy went great as usual. Toward the end, my doctor started talking about an early induction. If you've read my other posts, you know that I have big babies. She was just trying to save me from a c-section. I really like to go into labor on my own, though, so I begged my doctor to give me a little longer. She agreed, but gave me a deadline. I had been having contractions for a few weeks, but they were changing me slowly. 
     On a Sunday, when we got home from church, Mom called me up. She was bored, so we decided to go to the hospital and have someone check on my progress. We stopped and ate Subway on the way. We got there around 2:00 or 2:30. When the nurse checked me, she said, "Raven, what were you dialated  at your check-up the other day?"
     Me: "She said a two. Why? What am I? Still a two?"
     Nurse: "Six."
     Um...say what? Did she just say six? Breathe Raven. Collect yourself. "Okay. We'll go home, so I can help Matt get the boys ready. Then I'll ride back with him." 
     Nurse: "You can't leave. You're in labor."
     Me: "I don't feel in labor. Can I hang out in Little Rock for a while?"
     Nurse: "I am going to go call the doctor." [Exit Nurse]
     I scrambled to get myself together and then marched myself right out to that desk. I heard the nurse tell my doctor my status, and then that I wanted to go home and get everything together and come back. Then I heard my doctor laugh. I figured that meant I wasn't going anywhere.
     I called Matt to let him know that I was aparently in labor, and that he would need to put the clothes in the dryer and get the boys ready and head my way. Well,... Matt flipped out. The boys weren't dressed, and Camden had just poured Kool-Aid in his hair. This was not going as planned. I hoped Matt remembered to put the clothes in the dryer. He got there a little after 4:00 I think (about the time I  actually started  feeling like I was in labor), and about two and a half hours later I was complete. A few minutes after that, my daughter was born.

This is my living doll.

Bliss Elaine
8 pounds 9 ounces
20 inches long
Born at 6:43 P.M.

This is her a couple hours later after her first bath. She's wearing an outfit that I made for her.

Of course, you know this experience surfaced a few reminders.
1. Surprises are indeed surprises!
     - I always thought a surprise pregnancy would really neat. What I didn't think about, was that in order to be surprised, it couldn't be planned.

2. A mother will go any lenth to protect her child.
     - My mom jokes around that I sounded like an addict
contacting whomever I had to in order to get my meds.

3.If God has a will for your life, he will provide a door.
     - God arranged our pregnancy and he took care of my baby girl. Trust me, I know that things don't always turn out happy or what we see as perfect, but I do know that God has a perfect will.

4.God's plan's are always the best plans. Period.
     -While another baby was not in our plans at the time, I don't even want to think about life any other way. I cannot look at this baby without smiling. She truly live's up to her name. She IS an overwhelming joy. This is the face I get to see every day of my life!

Here is Little Miss Priss Bliss at her First Birthday Party.



A lesson in Miracles - Camden's Birth Story

     When Matt and I decided we were ready to have another baby, we expected things to go just like the last time. It didn't happen that way, though. I won't get into too much detail, but after multiple losses (and obviously massive devastation with each loss), I was not handling things well at all.
     God spoke to me through someone who had been through so much more than I had. The thing that she told me that stuck with me the most was, "DON'T YOU DARE let circumstances like this happen in vain. Take this and become closer to the Lord because of it." That's exactly what I did. I picked myself up, poured over my Bible, prayed without ceasing, and God become my best friend. I still cried often. Years later, even now, I still do when I think about it. I would have never wanted these circumstances, but I wouldn't change that most intimate time with the Lord. It forever changed my life, and strengthened my faith. In the midst of one of the darkest times of my life, God performed a miracle in me.   
     When we were ready to try again, we saw a fertility doctor. A couple months later, we were expecting again. The doctor's office was our second home for a couple months. When all looked okay, we were able to go back to our regular OB. I had a great pregnancy. I LOVE being pregnant.
     When I was 38 1/2 weeks, we had finally settled on a name. At exactly thirty nine weeks, I went into labor right after I woke up for the day. The pain wasn't so bad though. Mom came and hung out. We went to the hospital just to see what my progress was. I was three to four centimters. The nurse said they could admit me then, or I could go walk around for a while if I wanted. I decided to go eat mexican food (Yum-o!) and go shopping. Probably not the best idea, I know. Then I went home, straightened the house up, and did my nails. At about ten o'clock that night, I started hurting a bit more intensly. It was about that time that the hospital had called and said things were starting to get busy. So, if I wanted a room, I had better come on in (Thank the Lord for connections). So, we loaded up an went.

Here is what I looked like pregnant with this whopper. Can we say, "Giant?"

   I think I was around 5 or more centimeters upon arrival to the hospital. Things were pretty uneventful until my water broke. I was standing in my room when a contraction hit. I could not move or speak. When I found words, I yelled for Matt to get someone to get me my epidural NOW. I always tell people that only Jesus himself felt more pain than that. After Matt helped me to the bed, he went and got someone. I had another one of those monster contractions, and told the anesthesia person that another was coming and to hurry so I wouldn't have to suffer through it. He said he would have to wait until that contraction was over, because he could not stick a needle in my back when I was tense. Are you kidding me!?! Ugh! Anyhow, I got my epidural, and was a very happy woman. I slept until the nurse came in to check my progress. She told me I was eight centimeters and that maybe in about an hour or so we could have our baby.
     Five minutes later, I felt intense pressure. I told Matt to get someone because the baby was coming and could not wait. The nurse came to check things out, got a frightened look on her face, and called the desk to tell them to find the doctor because she couldn't leave the room. It took them what seemed like forever to find the doctor. I told them Camden would have to be born without one. Thankfully the doctor came in just in time to catch Camden. It wasn't even a whole push before that little man said hello to the world.

Silas was the first to come in and meet his baby brother. He kept telling everyone he was going to have a pink baby. Ha!

Camden Isaiah
9 pounds 1 ounce
22 inches long
Born at 6:20 A.M.

         Looking down at my sweet newborn boy really made me think about not only what a miracle HE was, but every baby that is born perfectly healthy. I am amazed and somewhat obsessed with how God takes a speck sized fertilized egg and, in nine short months, turns it into a masterpiece. He makes a whole baby! Every organ is perfectly formed. Every body part is perfectly placed. To me, one of the biggest miracles is a newborn baby.

Would I love him? - Silas' Birth Story

     When Matt and I had been married for about a year and a half, when I was 21 years old, we decided we were ready to have a baby. Immediately after, and I do mean immediately, we were expecting. I was so excited! During my last trimester, however, I began to wonder what I had gotten myself into. I never was a kid person. I would hold babies that everyone would go crazy over, and think "Eh...I'm just not feelin' it". I became terrified that I would not love Silas. I had begun to let that fear consume me.
     Fast foward to the night before Silas' birth. I was at an ornament exchange, and I just started thinking that things felt different. Not physically, but I couldn't explain it. Maybe the game of categories raised my blood pressure. Hee! Hee! Just kidding. (I do think I won, though.) I just felt like life was about to change....soon!  That night I went to bed and woke up in a puddle. A few minutes later, I started feeling the contractions. I had Matt call my Mom (a labor and delivery nurse) to tell her I was in pain. She told Matt to ask me if it was pain I was feeling or just fear? Ummm....I think I may have been a little short in my reply. Sorry Mom, but I was hurting! I won't even mention the fact (or maybe I will) that she asked if there was a possibility that I just peed in the bed. The nerve! She just didn't want me to have a false hope if I wasn't really in labor. Mom did come over and help us time contractions and stuff. She's the best nurse I know.
      I do like to labor at home as long I can, so at about ten o'clock that morning Matt and I were on our way to the hospital. I remember stopping a few times in the parking lot because I had a difficult time walking with contractions. Never the less, it was still quite some time before my baby boy would arrive. I was about 5 centimeters when I got there. Several hours later, I was stuck at eight. And Silas had not dropped.  They informed me I would need  a c-section, and went to set up. Meanwhile, the tears wouldn't cease. This is not how I had hoped things would turn out. My wonderful nurse, feeling sorry for me, got a thoughtful look on her face and said, " Raven, why don't we just see what happens when you push. After just one contraction Silas had moved all the way down and he was born just a few contractions later. Since his cord was wrapped from head to toe like a decorated Christmas tree (which would explain the terrifying decels), I did not get to hold him right away. Thankfully all of the necessary equipment was in the room, so Silas never had to leave my side while they were making him all better.
   Now, back to my fear that I wasn't going to love him. That was DUMB! I loved him with a new kind of love that I had never experienced before (Yes, I know that's what all of you moms had tried to tell me). And I hadn't even held him yet. The nurse told my mom that I just kept crying, repeating the words, "My baby, my baby".  He was able to stay in the room with me the whole hospital stay. I wanted to hold him constantly. The times the nurses did have to take him to the nursery for one reason or another, I would cry and keep calling the nurse asking when they were going to bring him back. I bet they LOVED me. Ha! They probably couldn't wait until I was discharged. It didn't change when we were home either. I never put him down. To this day, I can't let him be gone too long or too far away.
     So, good thing for Silas, God worked it all out. He is loved. I know a few of you were really worried about how this post would end. Well, get a look at this.

Silas Russell
8 pounds 3 ounces
20 1/2 inches long
Born at 8:03 P.M.

    
That was then.......This is now.....

Introducing...

The first thing I should do is introduce you to my family.

This is me. Yes I'm big and pregnant here, but I like this picture. I feel I have a certain glow. LOL! I love my life. I stay home and homeschool my little ones. Everyday is a new adventure that I can't wait to explore. I cherish each day, and have made it my goal to not take any time with them for granted.

This is my husband, Matt. He is great for me. He is almost always doing something fun with us or planning something fun to do with us. He likes to help with anything. He is a servant. That is his love language. If I need something for a home project or a homeschool project, he almost always makes it for us. He LOVES a challenge! When he does something, he does it BIG! Ooh, how I love this man!

This is Silas. He is six. He is an old soul. He loves talking to anyone he meets. He has a story for everything. He likes food that you wouldn't think a six year old would like. He loves old movies. Silas loves the Lord with his everything. He can often be caught stopping everything to pray, even if it's in the middle of Walmart. He is my cuddler, my list maker, my dreamer. The only problem is he is a bit of a hoarder. YIKES! I'll get more into that when it's his turn for my "Silas" blog.

This is Camden. He is three. Camden is his daddy in EVERY way. He looks like Matt, acts like Matt, and even walks like him. He is rough and tumble. His smile will make you melt. He can often be found copying everything his brother does, because he is obsessed with him. Strangly enough, at the same time, he doesn't do anything he doesn't want to do. He marches to the beat of his own drum. Camden is extremely technology savvy and great with numbers (for a three year old that is). He likes to "wash" dishes, help cook, and eat lots and lots of ketchup (oh, and apples).

And this...this is little Miss Bliss Elaine. She is one. This picture, taken by my wonderful sister-in-law, captures this little one's personality perfectly.  I really didn't know what to expect with a girl. It is COMPLETELY different. I know that I have completely intensified it, but she seems to love it, and so do I. She is my "Lovely". Matt and the boys are completely wrapped. I love to watch their exchanges with her. Bliss is dainty when she needs to be, and a firecracker when lifes "trials" need her to be so. She loves her purses, music, baby dolls, and glowworms. Black beans are her favorite food. Fairy Colors is her favorite book. Bliss loves her bed. And I love my girl!!!